“We don’t want to fight,” the couple told me through tears. “We just want this to be over without destroying our family.”
As a Sarasota collaborative divorce attorney with over a decade of family law experience, I’ve guided hundreds of couples through both traditional litigation and the collaborative divorce process. The path you choose will fundamentally shape not just the outcome, but how your family heals and moves forward.
What Is Collaborative Divorce in Florida?
In collaborative divorce, both spouses and their attorneys sign an agreement committing to resolve everything outside of court. No judge, no courtroom battles, no aggressive litigation tactics.
As a collaborative divorce lawyer in Sarasota, I work with couples in respectful, productive sessions. We often bring in neutral professionals like financial advisors or child specialists when needed. Everyone at the table has one goal: reaching a fair agreement that works for your entire family.
The key difference? If either party decides to go to court, both attorneys must withdraw from the case. This ensures everyone stays committed to finding solutions, not fighting battles.
When Traditional Divorce Litigation Becomes Necessary in Sarasota
Traditional divorce litigation means each spouse hires an attorney, and if you can’t reach an agreement, a Sarasota County judge makes the final decisions.
As a Sarasota divorce attorney, I’ve seen that litigation is sometimes necessary when:
- Your spouse is hiding assets or income
- There’s a history of domestic violence or abuse
- Your spouse refuses to negotiate in good faith
- There’s active substance abuse or untreated mental illness
- Emergency intervention is needed (threats to leave the state with children, asset dissipation)
Even in traditional divorce, over 90% of cases settle before trial. The difference is that litigation always has that courtroom threat looming in the background, which changes the entire tone of negotiations.
Collaborative Divorce Cost vs. Litigation Cost in Sarasota
Financial Investment
Collaborative divorce cost in Sarasota typically ranges from $7,500 to $15,000 per spouse, depending on complexity.
Traditional litigation cost can easily run $15,000 to $50,000 per person, with complex cases going much higher. Court proceedings require extensive document preparation, depositions, hearings, and potentially a trial—each step means more billable hours.
Timeline for Divorce in Sarasota County
Collaborative divorce timeline: Usually 3 to 6 months.
Litigation timeline: Often stretches 12 to 18 months or longer, especially with Sarasota County’s court calendars. Every extra month is another month of uncertainty for you and your children.
Emotional Impact
I’ve seen litigation turn co-parents into enemies. The adversarial nature of court proceedings can damage relationships permanently.
In collaborative divorce, you’re learning communication skills you’ll actually use for co-parenting after the divorce. You’re separating marital issues from your parenting relationship, which pays dividends for years to come.
How Divorce Affects Children: Collaborative vs. Litigation
Children whose parents choose collaborative divorce in Sarasota typically fare much better emotionally.
In divorce litigation, children often:
- Feel caught in the middle
- Face interviews by custody evaluators
- Feel pressure to choose sides
- Overhear angry phone conversations
- Show stress through declining grades and behavior changes
Collaborative divorce keeps children out of the conflict. We might bring in a child specialist, but their role is to help parents understand their children’s needs, not to evaluate custody.
I recently worked with a family where the teenage daughter wrote her parents a letter thanking them for “not making the divorce about winning.” That’s the power of keeping it collaborative.
Benefits of Collaborative Divorce: When It Works Best
Collaborative divorce in Sarasota really shines when:
You want to maintain a respectful co-parenting relationship. Maybe you’ll be co-parenting for years or run a business together. Collaborative divorce preserves and even improves communication.
You value privacy in your divorce. Court proceedings are public record. Collaborative negotiations stay completely confidential.
You have complex financial situations. Business valuations, stock options, or retirement accounts often benefit from creative problem-solving. Florida courts apply rigid formulas; collaborative divorce lets you craft custom solutions.
Your children’s wellbeing comes first. If you both genuinely want to minimize the impact on your kids, collaborative family law provides the best framework.
You want control over your divorce outcome. In court, a Sarasota judge who doesn’t know your family makes decisions about your future. In collaborative divorce, you and your spouse maintain complete control.
Choosing Between Collaborative Divorce and Litigation: Questions to Ask
When clients come to my Sarasota family law office unsure which path to take, I ask them to consider:
- Can you sit in the same room with your spouse and have a productive conversation? If not now, could you with support from a collaborative divorce attorney?
- Do you trust that your spouse will be honest about finances in the collaborative process?
- How important is it to maintain a working relationship after divorce?
- Can you afford the potential cost of divorce litigation?
- How quickly do you need a divorce resolution in Sarasota County?
The Middle Ground: Hybrid Approach to Divorce in Florida
You don’t have to choose immediately. Many of my clients start with the collaborative divorce process, giving it an honest try. If it doesn’t work, we can transition to litigation (though remember, I’d have to withdraw and you’d need new divorce counsel).
Some couples use a “collaborative-style” approach within traditional representation—prioritizing negotiation and mediation while maintaining the option to go to court if necessary.
The Choice That Shapes Your Future
Remember that couple I mentioned at the beginning? They chose collaborative divorce. Six months later, they were successfully divorced with a comprehensive parenting plan and were communicating better than they had in years. Their children adjusted well because they never felt the poison of parental conflict.
Whether you choose collaborative or litigation, the key is choosing the path that aligns with your values, protects your interests, and serves your children’s best interests.
Your divorce will end eventually. The question is: what kind of relationship will you have with your ex-spouse when it does? The process you choose plays a huge role in answering that question.
Contact a Sarasota Collaborative Divorce Attorney
If you’re facing divorce in Sarasota, Manatee, or the surrounding Florida counties, I offer consultations where we can discuss your specific circumstances. Sometimes I recommend collaborative divorce, sometimes litigation, and sometimes a hybrid approach. What matters most is that you understand your options and feel confident in your choice.
Not all family law attorneys are trained in collaborative divorce. At Bragg Family Law, Attorney Adam Bragg has specialized collaborative divorce training and experience in both approaches.
Contact Bragg Family Law today at (941) 893-1555 to schedule your consultation with a Sarasota divorce attorney.